Hey guys. Sorry I’ve not been very vocal out here in the Blogosphere over these last few days. I enjoyed a long holiday weekend with my family and kept it kinda low key. My daughter and her soccer team (and my amazing husband, the coolest soccer coach ever!) won their game in the freezing cold on Saturday morning. The hubby and I enjoyed a “date night” Saturday night (and watched the Nebraska Cornhuskers get mutilated…*le sigh*), and we spent Sunday with loved ones out of town celebrating my father-in-law’s 62nd birthday. I treated myself Monday to a little pampering at the spa, followed by a morning of shopping and a delicious lunch date with my hubby. It was a good and (very!) much-needed time of relaxation and love after a horrible, horrible week. Sorry to have been so silent. The bloviations are back. You’re welcome.
Something happened to me today that…I don’t even know how to describe it. As you know, I spoke to my detective at the Kansas City Assault Squad last Friday. (Need a refresher? Click here.) He told me that he had issued the summons to the woman who battered me on Friday morning. I didn’t know what “issued the summons” meant, and should have asked. Did he put it in the postal mail? Did they drive out to Overland Park and give it to her at her office? In my haste and impatience, I called my detective yesterday and asked what the status of my case was. He explained that the summons was sent to her in the mail on Friday, and that there was really nothing for me to do now other than to wait for my summons to come in the mail. I asked if he would be at court and he said that he’d only come if the judge instructed him to. He said that if she were to walk in and accept responsibility for everything, there would be no need for him to be there. I asked him about what Officer Hamlett had said…that most people plead these sorts of cases out to avoid a hearing and going to court. Oddly enough, he said that his experience has been the polar opposite. He said that most of the time, these cases do go to court. He said that the defendant hopes that the plaintiff won’t show up, and that the judge will subsequently throw the case out. I was stunned. People really do that?! People really come this far only to turn their backs and walk away? He said that they do (and he doesn’t understand why, either). Unbelievable. I’ve come this far, and I will see it all the way through. I don’t want to go to court, but I will do it. I deserve it. I deserve the unfettered opportunity to stand up for myself to the woman who bullied and battered me…to have my voice heard and to stand up for civility and what’s right. With the love and support of the people who will be in the courtroom with me (and those of you who are cheering me on on the sidelines!), I know it will be just fine. Anyway, back to the summons. Doing the math, I figured that she probably got her summons in the mail today. You figure, Friday and Saturday and Tuesday (today…remember, yesterday was a federal holiday) would be plenty of time for a summons to get from Jackson County, Missouri to Johnson County, Kansas. All day long, I thought about it. Did it come? Did she see it? Did her husband retrieve it and call her at the office to tell her? Or would she see it when she got home? What happens now? All sorts of irrational (or are they?) worries flooded my mind. Are my family and I safe? On the bus ride home tonight, I noticed I had a new follower on Twitter. Someone brand new to Twitter as of October 5th (the day after the incident)…someone with only two tweets and who also follows TheJO…was suddenly following me. A female. I immediately panicked. I was afraid that it was my batterer. I feared that somehow she had found me online and knew who I was and knew about my life. As you know, I tend to be very open about my life here on my blog and online. My Facebook page is completely private, but my Twitter page was w-i-d-e open for all the world to see, and it included information about my daughter and my family…oh, and links to this blog. I was so afraid that she had found me. My Twitter account is now set to private and no one can see it that I don’t allow to, but has the damage already been done? And am I insane to worry like this? Is it rational for me to be afraid that she may try to find out who I am and cause harm to me or to the people I love? It’s on my mind a lot. I truly, truly believe that she suffers from some sort of pathology. Obviously! Who else would behave in the manner that she has? Is she sick enough to hurt me or to hurt the people I love? I’m afraid, and I don’t know if I should be.
Am I crazy? Am I taking this too far?